Come Kindled

“People need to be reminded more often than they need to be instructed.”
– Samuel Johnson

Recently, a group of Friends from my meeting arrived late to quarterly meeting. Worship had gone a bit late, we had to get lunch, and the drive took over an hour. After arriving and finding our seats, the clerk shared a query before the meeting began:

Are all meetings for worship and for business duly held and are you regular and punctual in attending them?

Punctual, eh? This clerk was taking “pacifist aggressive” to the next level, turning the queries on us because we were a few minutes late. We attempted the silence but couldn’t help chuckling.

After a respectful and reflective centering time, we queried as to the process of choosing the query. The clerk laughed and claimed the selection was random. I guess I’ll believe her…

I believe her because she’s not the kind of Friend to weaponize a query. And because some version of that query is relatively common in the Quaker world. It’s typically followed by a question about coming “with heart and mind prepared.”

Do you come to worship with heart and mind prepared?

This can be hard because, much of the time, our hearts and minds are fairly frantic. We are rushing our kids to an activity, running late to a meeting, trying to plan meals, get the oil changed, mow the lawn, pay the bills, and, oh right, we have a soul that needs tended and a spiritual community that needs nurtured.

Sometimes, Sundays are hard. Not because we don’t care or we don’t long be among Friends in the Divine Presence. But because the other six days are so packed that it feels like our only opportunity to get some down time or “me time” and worship can feel like work. We have to shower, get dressed, and be presentable. We may have to fight with the kids to get ready. We will definitely have to fight the monkey mind that tells us we should be doing (or worrying about) other things.

Sometimes, simply arriving is enough. We trust that God is gracious. We hope that Friends will be friendly. We recall that 90% of life is just showing up. Find a seat, take a load off, draw a breath. Settle into a space of prayer and worship.

[If this is you, know that the people who matter would rather you show up despairing and disheveled than not at all!]

I get it — even (especially) as a pastor! I’m often eager to be among Friends, to host a sacred space, and share what I feel led to share. But some days, I’d rather stay in bed, curled up in a mental cave, and talk to no one for a little while.

But that darn query pokes me as the weekend begins: Do you come with heart and mind prepared?

To fulfill my calling, I have to make a weekly decision to get up and show up. To be prepared with bulletins, illustrations, songs, etc. But just as importantly, I’m called to be prepared in my body and my soul. My self-talk on Sunday mornings often involves a reminder that the priority is not to come with profound insights or rad sermons, but to come spiritually present and mentally prepared.

Present to my people and their gifts, pains, longings, and leadings.

Present to the moment and whatever challenges, opportunities, or openings it offers.

Present to God who is the Great I Am — One who can only be encountered in the sacrament of the present moment.

Usually, this means I have to take time to wrestle with my God (a text or spiritual message) and my demons (inner voices that call me things other than “beloved”) and win a blessing I can share with my people. Sometimes it’s more like trusting that others are wrestling too and that God is a good enough communicator that ministry will come forth in any case.

Here’s the thing, though. It can’t just be me. Quakerism is a holy and risky experiment that doesn’t work if it’s only “clergy”-led. We abolished the laity and rely on the Holy Spirit as discerned by a gathering of ordinary people who are also Friends and Prophets of God.

If you have a pastor and think they can carry a community to God by their own cleverness or holiness, I promise (affirm) you that they can’t.

To be fair, none of us can.

There’s a story about a disciple who went to their teacher and asked: “Is there anything I can do to make myself enlightened?”

The teacher responded: “As little as you can do to make the sun rise in the morning.”

So the student asked: “Then what is the use of these spiritual exercises you prescribe?”

And he replied: “To make sure you are not asleep when the sun begins to rise.”

We can’t control God or manufacture spiritual encounters. But we can come with hearts and minds prepared for whatever and Whoever may happen.

Like Elijah of old, we can only stand on the mountain waiting for the Divine to pass by (1 Kings 19). We can position ourselves for the Presence. We can incorporate preparative practices that help us stay awake for those spiritual “sunrises.”

This is a communal calling. We come prepared because the energy we bring impacts the whole meeting. To shift metaphors: when we come kindled, we can multiply the Light in the room and light the candles for others who may be struggling.

Thomas Kelly put it this way:

Some individuals need already, upon entering the meeting, to be gathered deep in the spirit of worship. There must be some kindled hearts when the meeting begins. In them and from them begins the work of worship. The spiritual devotion of a few persons, silently deep in active adoration, is needed to kindle the rest, to help those others who enter the service with tangled, harried, distraught thoughts to be melted and quieted and released and made pliant, ready for the work of God and His Real Presence.

In other words, we are called to “come kindled.” If we can’t all do this, every week, we need at least for there to be “some individuals” — call them elders, weighty Friends, intercessors, anchors — who are committed to coming with heart and mind prepared.

When we come kindled, we become Quaker leaders, no matter our role or title.

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Queries:

What practices or perspectives help you come to worship with heart and mind prepared?

Who in your meeting often comes kindled and how can we name and appreciate this ministry?